Chicago Cubs Baseball

Chicago Cubs pitcher Carlos Zambrano and catcher Michael Barrett took the baseball phrase “battery mate” to a whole new level with Friday’s clubhouse fracas.

Unfortunately for Zambrano, he may have won the battle, but most likely lost the war. After the clubhouse altercation, Zambrano reportedly drove away in a Hummer, while Barrett was spared an ambulance ride. His stitch trip to repair his fat lip was conducted in a mere modest BMW.

Ironically, the drive byes may have been our first glimpse into the final ride into the sunset for both Cub players.

With the 2007 Chicago season coming apart at every nail, it’s fast becoming evident that with the exception of a handful of Cubs, no one from management to player is exempt from a ticket out of the Windy City. And especially for the players with the July trading period a calender flip away.

And that was before Friday’s pugilistic goings-on.

Private or in public, business or in baseball: flare-ups are inevitable. What our boys in blue forgot - or given their character, simply didn’t know - is the number one rule regarding interpersonal conflict: Production Excuses.

As long as success is occurring, executives in any sector will overlook certain behaviors - tardiness, long lunches, scuffles in the clubhouse, etc… But when profits go down, or in this instance, losses pile up, something or someone is going to take the blame.

Enter Barrett and Zambrano. Or Punk vs. Plunk.

For Zambrano, the fracas catapulted his Cubs career into the category of double jeopardy. In the final year of his contract and negotiations stalled pending the imminent sale of the Cubs, Zambrano’s future already was considered hazy, if not cloudy, at best.

Toss in an underachieving year with past and present flare-ups and my guess is Cubs management will be happy to fill up the tank on Big Z’s Hummer.  If he’ll just quietly leave town.

As for Barrett, he’s been the Cubs’ Blunder Boy almost since his arrival. Up until this point, the catcher always has been able to cover his defensive inefficiencies with an inconsistently solid bat.

As a streak hitter, Barrett’s batting average is wildly up and down the scale. Currently at .241, Barrett’s BA has been plummeting more towards his baseball IQ.

Let’s face it.  Anyone who can turn the White Sox A.J. Pierzynski into a “good guy” requires far more than any anger management training can provide.

It’s no great secret the Cubs organization has been operating as a dysfunctional family for quite some time. But instead of keeping its problems behind locked doors and drawn shades, Zambrano and Barrett bare knuckled it all for the world to see.

Friday’s show is over. All that’s left is for general manager Jim Hendry to find a couple of teams interested in a pair of underachieving hot heads.